Round and Round We Go

Still playing data exchange with the IA doctor and the orphanage doctor. The time difference is painful. I'm also pulling my already gray hair out by the handfuls.

Meanwhile, I'm concentrating on enjoying my time at the babyhouse. I visit twice a day, from 10 to 12 in the morning, and again from 3:30 to 5:30 in the afternoon. I feed him his lunch in the afternoon, and am allowed to give him juice and fruit during both visits. I try not to worry about anything while I'm there, but playing with the handsome little guy that I hope is meant to be my son. The wheels are still turning to make it all happen. Passport pictures have been taken, paperwork has been filed, and the photo journal of our time together is in work. Keep your fingers crossed that I'll be posting some of those photos tomorrow!

And they had better cover those plants and wrap the pipes, because a cooling trend is upon us! It was in the mid-80s today, which is where it is supposed to stay for the next few days. Very pleasant outside and there is usually a breeze blowing. The babyhouse is a little different story. They do allow us to open the playroom windows and, surprisingly, are dressing the kids in little more than tank tops and shorts. Definitely an improvement over the bundled up as if were snowing in the building ways of the past.

Holding Pattern

I know, I know, NOT what you want to hear. Me either, but progress is being made and things are settling down. I’m trying to be flexible and patient, but patience is hard to find when you NEED to make a decision on a child that you are becoming more attached to with every visit.

The circumstances were unusual in one sense and completely normal in another – no one’s fault – but agonizing all the same. If it weren't for several things, including my own need for some extra reassurance on the medical front, I would likely have the IA doctor evals complete and could rest easy, or would be moving to the next steps in finding the right child for me. I expected to be WAY past this part of the process by now. Should be. Want to be. With every ounce of my being.

As of right now, I am awaiting one review with the IA doc that should occur within the next couple of hours. Trying to stay occupied, awake, and not stress until then. I'm keeping a positive outlook.

Meanwhile, I'll bore you with the day to day life thus far. I HAVE INTERNET!! I have also figured out how to light the stove without blowing up the building (fingers are only a little singed), I can say about three things in Russian that can actually be understood, I have run the little washing machine despite the Russian manual and my clothes actually came out clean, the same color and in one piece, I have a few new towels, sheets, and a buck-forty super lightweight nightie that was The Find thus far. Yes, it is hot here. Yes, the clothes I packed don't help. Live and learn.

I've now experienced the infamous brown waters of Kaz in person. The hot water was off for most of the day and when it comes back on, those old rusty iron pipes come with it!

I have ventured out a couple of times on my own. There is shopping very close – retail therapy is a great distraction. Have managed to stock up at the grocery store and discovered that everyone and their brother goes to the market on Friday evenings between 6:30 and 8. Reminded me of Costco on a Friday after work, just on a much smaller scale.

Have been to the nearby mall several times as well. Earlier this week, Regina and I both bought vin-til-ya-tars, otherwise known as fans, in a meager attempt to stay cool. The one in Regina’s apartment had given up the ghost the day before and the ones in the shop were exhibiting the same symptoms. Took several tries before the eager sales woman found two that were working. And they weren’t cheap. We made a bet on whose “Made in China” fan dies or burns up first. Burning up seems to be a common occurrence with anything electrical here.

Mentioning burning up, I have not sweat so much in my life. Seriously. Ugh times 10. I know, TMI. If it weren’t so miserable and embarrassing, it would almost be funny. Here I am hair dripping, make-up long gone (except for the mascara smeared all over under my eyes), red-faced, clothes soaking wet and stuck to me, and everyone else in the queue looks like they just stepped out of the salon with not a sticky drip of moisture in sight. I somehow thought that it was at least as or more arid here than in Denver. I was wrong. The nice woman at the little cold case counter in the mall actually chuckled after I was pushed aside several times by more assertive shoppers and asked only for a BIG bottle of water. I think I may have been panting.

My favorite experience so far was in the produce market. A portly grandmother-type gave me a smile (rare among strangers here) as I wandered by, so my choice of which stall to buy from was made. There was a man talking to her from my side of the stand, that I’m pretty sure was Mr. Portly. I pointed at the oranges and apples and help up 2 fingers, pa-jul-sta, and the games began. Mrs. Portly bagged up my order, while Mr. Portly tried to get me to buy two of everything else they had. He was laughing and teasing and it felt really good to make even a passing connection with someone here. I’ll be visiting them again soon.

So now that I have entertained you with the scintillating accounts of my shopping adventures, I’ll tell you what I have so far determined are must haves:

• a BIG plastic drinking glass and/or cup. A single can of Coke will fill the average glass in Kaz 3 or 4 times. Think Dixie cup. The kind that went into that little dispenser stuck on the wall in your bathroom when you were a kid. If you want to have a nice big glass of anything in your apartment, bring your own. I couldn’t even find one in the mall.

• Eurosurge -- the power fluctuates here constantly.
  

• Learn some Russian!!! I started too late, but am happy I at least can count to 10 and mumble a passable please, thank you, and good morning. And, of course, the much needed Pampers. ;) I have never been good with languages, but it is interesting how my college French is coming back to me, along with my grade school Spanish. Not sure why being talked to in Russian has me thinking in French. Very strange. As for Russian, I often think the one or two word response, but somehow cannot get anything coherent to come out my mouth. Not that that is particularly unusual for me anywhere! Regina is amazing. She carries on entire conversations like a native, while I'm still mumbling "je ne sais pas."

No news yet

Just wanted to let you all know I'm still here. Unfortunately, don't have any exciting updates yet. I am still in the process of having the IA doctor reviews, which have a been a bit delayed due in part to the translator not being available and now the weekend. I will be frank in that I have some concerns, but need some additional info from here and then to send it there and then to discuss and then to decide. It is agonizing. I haven't really been up to updating my blog.

It looks like next week before I have internet access in may apartment as well. It is just a simple fix/replacement of the phone jack (I think), but no one to do it until then. Meanwhile, Regina, being her usual gracious self, lets me log in from her apartment to quickly catch up between our daily babyhouse visits. And she fixes lunch and waits on me hand and foot! Ah, the life in Aqtobe!! ;) We did a quick run to the grocery store today for lunch and got what looked like chicken nuggets. Once heated up, we discovered they smelled a bit odd. Turned out we had little star, heart, shamrock, and fish shaped fishsticks! Preparation for lives as a mommies!

Thank you all for bearing with me. I don't know yet what is to come, but truly appreciate your support and good thoughts.

Aqtobe -- Alive and Well

It has been an interesting 24 hours. I made it to Aqtobe, only to find that the regional coordinator is out of town on a family emergency. The translator stepped in and the show continued. I am not ready to go into any detail at this point, but if all the necessary paperwork gets processed in time, I am going to have my first bonding visit with a little boy later this afternoon. The selection process was at lightening speed and I wasn’t given much info on this child and never met the babyhouse director. I am eager to talk to the orphanage doctor and to send what info is available to my international adoption doctor for evaluation.

As so many before me have said, the experience was overwhelming. I am still shell-shocked, stunned, head is spinning. Hit the wall at 100mph yesterday afternoon and finally gave in and slept off and on until this morning.

Due in part to the coordinator being absent, there was no apartment available when I arrived, so was told I’d be staying with Regina (a beautiful and sweet woman from South Carolina) for a few days. Regina and her husband, Frank, are adopting an adorable toddler boy and are part way through the post-court appeal period at this point. She has been a lifesaver. It was wonderful to have her support and advice during all of this and I will be forever grateful for her willingness to share her accommodations and to help me through this momentous life-changing event. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Regina!

Destination, almost.

Hellooooo Almaty!

Well, I made it this far, rather uneventfully, and with all my luggage! Too much luggage, btw, but I knew that before I left the house. Flight was 45 minutes late leaving Denver. We aborted take-off because the brakes had overheated. Heard them and they didn’t sound good. Sweltered on the tarmac for about 30 minutes until they cooled off. Still trying to figure out why we needed brakes to take-off, but I guess it’s a good thing to have working when we land! And have to say that I have never taken an international flight that was not on a 747. This journey was an Airbus 300 (I think). Very uncomfortable seats and legroom left something to be desired. Not as bad as one trip I made on Philippine Air with knees jammed into the seat in from of me for 11 hours straight, however. Apparently, I’m a tad taller than your average Philippine native!

Had a whopping 30 minutes to make the connection in Frankfurt. Have to say those Germans (largely the population on the flight) know how to get off an aircraft in record time. Dankashen! (However you spell that!) Speed-walked with my 800 lb carry-ons to the far ends of the earth, or Lufthansa Terminal B as they called it, and paid $13 (after Euro conversion) for 2 bottles of water as the bus to my plane was boarding. Flight actually landed 30 minutes early in Almaty. Immigration was a breeze. Never a better sight to see (at nearly midnight and after 16 hours in the air) than a beautiful young woman smiling and waving at me through the glass doors on the other side of baggage claim. Marina, the Almaty coordinator, was also waiting for another family that was on my flight. They were headed to Semey today.

I was supposed to go to Aqtobe this morning, however all the flights were sold out. So I’m enjoying the comforts of the air-conditioned hotel, the scenery in the surrounding blocks, and will be on the early flight tomorrow. Once I arrive, I should go to the babyhouse for the big event. I’m thankful for the day of rest and preparation, but am worried about another day of other families arriving in the region and selecting children. I was told to get here as fast as possible for this reason. Very much first come, first served (as awful as that sounds) in Aqtobe blind travel. More on the process a bit later.

I managed to get some dollars exchanged for Tenge and had some fun with my very first excursion to a Kazakh grocery store. Wandered the aisles a bit and saw many familiar brands. Good when you can’t read the labels! Bought some yogurt, water, juice and not-so-fresh pastry (I failed to notice the 5-days-ago date on the bag). I was again reminded of Manila by the large number of employees in the grocery store. Several “stations” for different things all manned by a clerk, a woman at the front door to check your bags (apparently theft is a problem here), and various people straightening/stocking shelves, while other employees just walked around, or watched, or lurked. Seems many are employed, but likely all at a pittance.

Traveler Tip: With the focus on the crisp new bills we adoptive parents are told to bring, it didn’t occur to me to bring a few small clean bills for tips. I arrived too late to exchange for tenge at the airport. The bellhop kid was quite impressive. He hauled all my luggage at once up to the 4^th floor (what is an elevator?) and got a few US dollars in return. I do hope the currency exchangers will accept the bills – it was all I had.

Selection Process
For those of you that are scratching your heads at “selection process” and “blind travel” this is what I am talking about: In Kazakhstan, children available for adoption are only selected by prospective parents after the parents meet them in person. There is no official “referral” process as is typical in most other countries. This means I have no information at all (zero, zilch, zip) about the specific children I will be shown. The local officials know that I have been approved for a child of either gender up to 2 years of age, and that I may consider minor correctable health needs. I am hoping for a boy under 12 months old. Boys are more readily available than girls, but my primary concern is health.

Tomorrow, I expect to arrive in Aqtobe mid-morning, be taken to my apartment to drop off my luggage, quickly change my clothes, then head off to start the selection process. It is also possible I will go straight from the airport to the orphanage. At some point I will be interviewed by a representative of the Ministry of Education (the government agency that oversees adoptions in Kaz), then will meet the orphanage director. I will likely be asked a few questions about myself and the child that I desire, then a handful of children will be brought to me one at a time. From other blogs I have followed in Aqtobe, I expect to see no more than 3 children and also expect that one or more may be outside of my age range or have serious health issues. For many of these kids, the only real chance they have of being adopted is to meet prospective families. It will not be easy to “turn down” any child, but I completely understand why they may be brought to me. I know my limitations as a single first-time parent, and have to make the best choice for the child and myself. I will have a few minutes to interact with each child, then will make my decision to “bond” with one of the kids. “Bonding” is the mandatory 15-day period in which I will visit the child every day for a few hours before I am eligible to petition the court to adopt. If for some reason there is not a child that I am willing to start bonding with, my agency will attempt to send me to another region where other children may be available. This doesn’t happen often, but it is a Plan B if absolutely necessary.

So, I’m chillin’ and dozing today, reviewing some notes on the do’s and don’ts of the selection process, trying not to stress (actually doing a fairly good job of that), figuring out what I can possibly abandon/offload on the hotel housekeepers to lighten my ridiculous load ;), and am ready and waiting to go find my child. Gives me chills and still seems so very surreal. Cross your fingers, say a few prayers, and keep the good thoughts coming that all goes well tomorrow.

See ya on the other side!

And here I was all stressed about only having 3 days from The Call to travel! Try less than 48 hours! I'm almost packed, am praying I have all the paperwork, copies, money, etc., didn't get the house slightly cleaned, but oh well. It was a late night last night. Few more odds and ends, a shower, and off to the airport!

I've got a 1.5 hour layover in Frankfurt (keep your fingers crossed) and arrive in Almaty around midnight Sunday. Yay. Then I'm on an early morning flight to Aqtobe Monday morning. Who needs sleep?!

Want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart to all my friends, family, and blog friends out there that have shown me such incredible support. I wouldn't have made it this far without you. Also want to thank my friends and neighbors who are going to be taking care of the house and my furbabies while I'm gone. I'm going to miss their little whiskered selves so much, but I know they are in good hands.

I likely won't have internet access for a few days, so standby, stay tuned, and I'll be in touch as soon as possible from the flipside of planet Earth!

Alysa

Listen to the Music

My horoscope for today:

Today the universe is sending you some strong energy that will keep you grounded when you move into an unfamiliar situation. So don't worry if you're going on a first date, scheduled for a job interview, or having some other kind of unsettling conversation. You'll stay cool, calm and collected no matter what is going down. You'll be able to focus more on the exhilarating aspects of the unknown, and less on the scary aspects of it. You're about to learn about qualities you never knew you had.

Uh, okay. So, you hear that music playing yet? Give it a minute to start. Listen to the words.... Do you hear it?

I'M ON MY WAY!!!

Yes, to Kazakhstan! Despite the expectation by all that I would not be traveling until the end of the month or early August, the call came this afternoon to get myself on a plane ASAP! I'm scrambling to get everything done at work and home and am leaving Saturday.

My stomach is in knots, my head is pounding, my shoulders and neck are so tight I can barely move, and I'm terrified! Sound about right? ;) So much for "cool, calm, and collected!" Deep breaths. And again. One more time. I can do this!

Woo-hoo! My little Kaz boy, I'm on my way to you!!

Have LOI, Will Travel... (Updated)

but not yet. Always seems to be a "but" with my process. My LOI has arrived, but I will not be traveling until at least the end of July or early August. Not the usual or expected 3 days from LOI to be on a plane scramble. But nothing is "usual" in Aqtobe or Kaz these days. So, not questioning why, just trusting things will all work out in the end. And reviewing my documents again to see what will have to be updated now. Several things for sure, including my I171-H.

(Update) Okay, I just reread this post and realized it sounds pretty negative. I guess I AM disappointed to hear that I won't be traveling as soon as expected, once again. I think I have been so obsessed with packing and ramped up to leave any minute for the past 6 weeks, that when the news came that that wasn't happening, I hit the wall. I have been exhausted ever since. I am hating the fact that I have MORE paperwork to update and it will be winter when this child comes home (especially with the additional week that the MoFA just announced is added to the paperwork process to leave Almaty), but, I DO HAVE MY LOI!!! That is reason to celebrate!

On the upside, I can get my visa now and just wait for the call to buy the airline tickets. Even gives me a chance to stop over in Frankfurt or Almaty and sleep for a day or two before I go to the babyhouse for the first time. All good. So, I'll sleep in tomorrow, do something fun this weekend, and get excited all over again to meet little Kaz Boy in a few more weeks. :)

Best Before MM/DD/YYYY

I scurried late last week and updated 14 of my soon-to-be-expiring dossier documents (all for at least the 3rd, if not the 4th time), managed to expedite new birth certificates (still not sure how they "expire"), and got everything apostilled. Still have a few more to do since I haven't traveled yet, but I hope they will happen quickly. Trying to stay on top of them.

But get this: my snacks are expiring!! Can't believe it. My damn stockpile of snacks! You know, the granola bars, peanut butter crackers, trail mix, etc. that everyone recommends you haul with you to Kaz? Well, I bought them all in March when the plan was to travel in April. Not stuff I eat everyday. Just happened to look at the packages tonight and most are expiring within the next month! I bought enough to get me through my entire journey to Kaz, which seems like it won't be over now until I have to trade mosquito repellent for snow boots. Maybe I was kinda dumb to buy food in advance, maybe just optimistic. Wonder if the squirrels will eat it. Or maybe stale snacks go just fine with cheap vodka and fermented horse milk. ;)

A Sign!

Not to be outdone by Susan (of the Hot Mama Florida S's), who is the queen of receiving "signs" that adopting a child from Kaz is meant to be (and boy, has she had a ton of them!), I think I might, at long last, have had a sign yesterday! Was waiting at a stop light and the beat up old car in front of me had a license plate that read: 120 KAZ. Woo-hoo! Finally!! Been racking my brain to figure out what significance the "120" has. I'm betting that is how much I get to pay in US dollars for my overweight luggage. ;)

So, just for fun, let's play a little game. How much AM I going to pay in US dollars in overweight fees from Almaty to Aqtobe? The winner will get a surprise gift! For those of you that are not or have not adopted from Kaz, the overweight fees are based on the cumulative weight of ALL your luggage, including carry-ons. You are allowed about 48lbs per person. Total. Here's a hint (and this is just the starter pile -- still need to add more clothes, laptop, paperwork, etc.):